My Take on Pasanga 2

These are a series of posts about a boy full of life, a happy child who sees no differences in people. A boy who thinks each and every person out there is a friend. A boy who doesn't see that people are judging him because he is different. It is about a boy who faces the usual challenges of a boy his age and several more challenges than a boy his age.

Pasanga 2 is another version of the popular and brilliantly made Taare Zameen Pe. Here's my disclaimer before I attempt to share my thoughts on this movie. When I saw Taare Zameen Pe, I was moved by its sheer brilliance and the fact that I remembered some aspects of dyslexia based on my Child Psychology paper.  When I saw Pasanga 2, I was 'affected' as I was seeing it through the eyes of a parent of a child with a learning disability (LD). 

What I Liked: 

• I love the fact that movies are being made on such sensitive topics.  I am asked why I send my son to a school 3 kms away and I honestly answer that he is in special education and is dyslexic. I feel so disappointed when an educated person with a clueless expression asks 'What's that?' They may understand if you mention Taare Zammen Pe. :| These movies help educate people about the learning disabilities and the challenges that parents and children face and some facilities that are available today.  
• Pasanga 2 managed to make me feel very emotional in the parts where the children struggle to be accepted and understood in a world where everything is black and white. Do teachers, parents, or just people understand how difficult it is for a child with LD to adjust and adapt to an academic environment? 
• I could also relate to the helpless that parents experience when they are trying to figure out the answer to the question 'WHY?' It takes time for parents to fully accept that a child may be different. Like in the movie, I remember relatives asking me if the child will at least come in the top three in class, and I was also advised to send the child to a hostel for better discipline. I was grateful that neither my husband nor I prolonged the torture to trying to make the child 'fit' in the academic space. We were never keen on ranks, exams, prestigious institutions, top jobs, and so on. We were sure that we want both our children to only enjoy school and learning will happen in a positive environment. They will find something that they are good at and pursue it. 
• There was a child psychiatrist and a special educator int he movie. I think both play a crucial role. Sometimes, I hear that a special educator is doing assessments for a child and then suggesting remediation. I wonder why the parents do not insist on meeting a child development specialist or a child psychiatrist and doing a formal assessment before even deciding on the treatment/remediation plans. In the movie, the child psychiatrist also works very closely with the parents to counsel them and bring about a mind shift in terms of how they view their child and their expectations from the child. The doctor can really help you de-stress if they give you the time to talk about your worries.     

What Irked Me: 

• While making movies on sensitive topics, the storyteller should do extensive research to ensure that he/she really understands what he/she is saying. This movie unfortunately got very preachy at some points and I found it very difficult to digest certain things. 
• The movie begins by showing for two pregnant women do during their pregnancies. One woman is constantly fighting with her husband. She also opts for a cesarean to ensure that her child is born at an auspicious time. The other woman works long hours, has Pepsi (seriously?), and watches a horror movie all alone at home (SERIOUSLY?). Later in the movie, these women ask the special educator what she did to get such angelic children. And would you believe it... the special educator actually starts narrating how she did things PERFECTLY doing her pregnancy. So this is what she says.... Her doctor advises her to have a C-Section, but she refuses and goes to  her parent's place in the village to have a natural delivery at home. During her pregnancy, she asks her husband to tell her that he loves her everyday. He does better than that he gives her a gift for each day that passes. She does yoga, reads and talks to her baby, pulls water out of the well, and so on. Therefore, VOILA... she has perfect children. I get the intent I really do. There are good practices that you must follow when pregnant. Does this mean leave your job and have your child in your native village? I think this portion of the movie is horribly flawed. Aren't there cases where you have not had Pepsi or fought with your husband or watched or horror movie, but are still blessed with a gifted child? Movie makers please be more sensitive toward the parents. They don't have to be blamed. It a horribly wrong message to send out.        
• The movie also touches on commercialization of educational institutions. Parents today run behind expensive schools assuming the quality of education is better. They are standing in long queues praying for admission into such a school. While I completely agree that the education system in India and the fee structure is a mystery that I still cannot understand, the special education centers are not altruistic, non-profit centers. In Bengaluru, based on personal experience, I can say that remedial centers also cost a bomb. There is no transparency here also in terms of why they are charging the earth. Parents are so worried about their child that they do not hesitate to make it happen. Clinics and assessment centers are also minting money by asking parents to do different behavioral, cognitive, sensorial (and a lot more!) assessments to find the answer to the persistent question: WHY? While you meet good people with heart, you also understand that at the end of the day, it has to be profitable for it to run. They tell us that they want to reach as many children as possible. I still believe that why don't you do it right with a few children first, ensure consistency, stability, and then expand? The quality of support is constantly wavering and qualified special educators are a rare breed. My point being...things are never as rosy as is portrayed in the movie. So, when push comes to shove, the teachers also blame the children for bad behavior and poor performance. Shouldn't they focus on why a child is so disturbed to behave a particular way? Like I said, it's neither easy nor a perfect world for all folks involved. Having said this, I am grateful that there are facilities available and there are good institutions changing children's lives year after year.    
• Lastly, boarding schools are not places where children are unhappy and are treated like prisoners! The messaging is plain wrong! 

Taare Zammen Pe was a brilliant movie that had a message. It did not preach or place blame on anyone. The teacher was not made out to be like god. He just 'understood'. It made you think about approaching things differently. This is what makes the movie great. Unfortunately, Pasanga 2 is misleading and lacks proper research and understanding the topic.    

Child with a Learning Disability: Post 1

These are a series of posts about a boy full of life, a happy child who sees no differences in people. A boy who thinks each and every person out there is a friend. A boy who doesn't see that people are judging him because he is different. It is about a boy who faces the usual challenges of a boy his age and several more challenges than a boy his age. 

THE BOY AND THE SCHOOL

The teacher complained that this boy was hitting other children in class. He needed help with his work. He was not interested in doing his work. She said please teach him at home also.

The parents took the role of a teacher at home. But when the parent sat to teach, the child howled and cried and refused to learn. They dreaded opening the school diary to see complaints like 'your son is troubling children of 1st grade.' The son played really well with children in the building. The parents were confused why their child was different in school. 

The parents tried to ask questions to the teacher such as 'what caused the child to lash out?' 'how do you handle it?' 'does he target specific children?' The teacher was vague in her answers, insisting that he just lashes out. On further questioning, she shared that he was not recognizing alphabets and numbers. She advised that the parents should try harder. These things happen because of working parents who don't have time for their children. She advised that the parents should hang alphabets and numbers chart and not to worry about the decor of the house.

Soon, the child got very restless at home also. He came back home and said 'Children say I don't know ABCs; I don't know how to talk; I don't know anything.' The distressed parents spoke to the pediatrician and special educator. They were both supportive and insisted we wait a few more months. An assessment was conducted after six months. The child was diagnosed as being at risk of a learning disability.

The parents shared the information with the teacher. The teacher hinted that these children do well in special schools. The parents had arranged a meeting with the Principal. The teacher calls the parent and says 'Ma'am, can you please tell the Principal that I helped you identify the problem? We are never given credit for anything. Also, the management is pro-parents and therefore insists that we say only nice things to the parents.' Needless to say, the parent already extremely emotional and stressed politely told the teacher to get lost.

The Principal was very supportive and the special educator worked her magic with the child. But things worsened in the classroom. Complaints kept coming in steadily from the class teacher. She way of handling was to give simple tasks to the child and then send him out to play. The communication between the teacher and the special educator was extremely poor due to the teacher's ego. The parents requested the teacher to become more sensitive and understand how to handle the child from the special educator. But resistance was evident. Why should I focus on one child when I have 29 others? Every other day, the child would come and tell the parent that he was punished. One day, the child came back and said 'I don't like my teacher. She asked me to get out of the school.' The parents, who had been very patient so far, met the Principal, gave feedback and removed the child from the school. The Principal explained that there are not equipped to handle these children (and by this I guess she meant, we also don't plan to be) and washed her hands off.

What do we expect from the teachers?

• We expect them to be impartial. Treat all children alike.
• We expect them to encourage children and provide them a positive environment to learn. 
• We expect them to have the student's interests at heart. 
• What is the point in focusing on the so called 'bright' children?
• We do look for professional behavior. 

Where do we take our children if the school that claims to be inclusive is really not? During a telephonic conversation, the teacher tells the parent. I am a software engineer, I came into this line after my son was born. I want to be with children. Is this reason enough to hire a teacher? Most schools may think kindergarten is not so critical. But it is equally critical as children with mouldable personalities and hearts are sent to kindergarten. The child, in this case especially, has a fragile ego and imagine what kind of risk we are putting him in by exposing him to insensitive and untrained teachers.

The teacher must not judge the child or their parents. Parents always want to do the best for their child. This particular teacher must remember that she is a working mother too. And must understand what causes learning disability before making statements that only prove her ignorance in the matter.

Coming back to the boy.... he was sent to The Deens Academy, where the Special Educator has a group of trained teaches, a classroom setting and good infrastructure to support children with mild to moderate difficulties. The Principal, the special ed staff, headmistress and the teacher in the class are all aware of the child's individual plan. The communication is open and therefore, the child is not treated wrongly. The teacher seeks out the special ed teacher incase she wants inputs on how a tantrum or a behavior can be corrected. Where would parents take their children if such schools didn't exist? Scary....  

If your child has a learning disability, ensure that you put him or her in the right environment. These children are very intelligent and learn different. Put them in a positive environment where teachers and the school actually do the job they are meant to do --- tap the child's potential.

Stress Busters

After dinner, we were catching up on the older episodes of Mahabharat. Vidur (almost 6) also sat to watch it with us.

The gist of the episode:
Pandavas and kauravas return from Gurukul and the King arranges a competition to showcase the rajkumars' skills. Duryodhan defeats Nakul, Sahdev, Yudhishter and Bheem. Arjun easily defeats Duryodhan by freezing him in a block of ice. Dronacharya declares him the winner and the best archer in the world. To contest this, Karan challenges Arjun. But everyone protests once they find out that Karan is a charioteer's son. 

Vidur asks me why is that man going away without fighting? My husband looks at me as he is clueless about how to go about explaining caste system. I tell Vidur 'He cannot fight Arjun because he is not a king'. The innocent mind quickly processes this information and then says 'But he is wearing nice clothes... why is he not a king?' We burst out laughing as it is true Karan is well dressed. Then I  point out that the Pandavas are slightly better dressed as they are wearing the body armor. This seemed to satisfy him.

Karan and Arjun begin to compete with each other. The duel proves that both are equally good archers. One arrow from Arjun heads straight for Karan. As it reaches Karan, the sun god's protective sheild protects him. 

Vidur then asks what was that yellow thing that came on that man's chest. We explain that it's a shield. He asks where did he get it. So I explain that Karan is the son of the sun and confuse him. :) Then Rajeev explains that Karan said his prayers daily so the sun god gave him the shield to protect him from arrows.

Kids ask the cutest questions!
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My daughter is now 1.5 years old. When she refuses to eat, I ask her shall I give it to Tuffy (out 3 year old retriever)? Typically, when they know there's competition, they want the item for themselves. This worked wonderfully in the beginning. Some time back, I offered her a biscuit. She tasted it and did not like it. She handed it back to me and said 'Tuffy'.  :) Now, everytime she decides she doesn't want something, she says Tuffy. Needless to say my dog is reaping the benefits!

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My mom asked Vidur 'Can I keep Drishya?' Vidur promptly replied 'No, Drishya came from my mom's stomach, so she is mine.'

In another instance, I was telling Vidur that like Drishya, Vidur was also in my tummy. He immediately asks 'Did Tuffy also come from your tummy?'

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Gone are the days when the kids come complaining about the other. Vidur and his cousin, Rishabh were playing. I heard Vidur apologizing to Rishabh over and over again. Out of curiosity, I asked what happened? Would you believe it - both looked at each other and did not answer. Then Rishabh reluctantly says 'Vidur did something that upset me. That's all.' My kids have grown up and are showing solidarity! :) 

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I spent 10 days at my parents place. My daughter kept calling out to her grandfather referring to him as 'thatha.' He is a little absent minded and didn't respond. When she saw that calling him thatha was not earning her a response, she promptly called him 'Ramu' (my mom calls him that). Dad was stunned and extremely amused.

My darling girl calls me 'Archana' (or her version of it Aschanaaaa) when she is irritated with me. :) KIDS!
 
These are true stress busters. :)

What's been up at Playschool

Who is supposed to 'hate' homework?
Aren't kids supposed to hate homework? In our case, it's me! Let me start at the beginning. Vidur has been enjoying school after the summer break. Now that Vidur is in Nursery, the school thinks he is old enough to do his homework. The school has made a very good impression on me and therefore, I decided to forgive them for doing so. ;) The homework typically consist of coloring activity in their school book. I tried to look at it from their angle and came up with the following:

• They want to ensure that children get used to the 'good' habit of doing homework at the tender age of 3.5. It helps the kids understand that they can't leave their school at school like people leave their work at work... (confusing?) What I really mean is, it is all about 'discipline' and keeping some time aside for learning.
• They believe that learning will be reinforced when it is also done at home. 
• The parents sit with their child to have a look at what is being done at school. They also spend bonding time and explaining and guiding the kid through the homework. 
• (on a lighter note) They are trying to find all who the really 'good' parents are. What I mean is... which parents truly have time for their kids, which kid listens best to their parents and so on. Every time Vidur refuses to cooperate, I feel that his teacher may think I don't have the time! :D

My first reaction when I saw the circular and the school book was 'oops, how am I going to keep V from spilling things on this book and keeping it neat and clean!' But, I have begun to realize how much Vidur enjoys showing off what he has learnt at school. The restless child that he is, he finishes it quickly and then moves on to painting at free will on a canvas. That's more his style, hates the rules and boundaries.. :)

Let the kid decide. 

Vidur, to a large extent, uses his left hand for doing things like throwing a ball, eating his favorite food, painting, and so on. He also uses his right hand every now and then. Few traditionalists have also asked him to use his other hand. He obeys them for a while and then reverts back to his left hand. I noticed that as soon as Vidur saw his school book and I asked him to color or write in it, he shifted the crayon to his right hand. As soon as he was done, I gave him his 'informal, non-school' drawing book to paint. He immediately shifted the paintbrush to his left. I wrote a note to his teacher and also spoke to the incharge at school. Here's what I said: 

Vidur prominently uses his left hand and ever since school has begun, I see that he tries using his right hand for doing the tasks that remind him of his school (mainly homework). I am really not particular about which hand he chooses, but I do want the teacher to leave that choice to Vidur. I told her that I understood that the teacher may not be aware and she helps him write by holding his hand. I wanted to bring this to their notice. The in-charge was really sweet about it. She agreed that it was not right to change the preference and that she will have a word with teacher.

His previous teacher had also confessed that she had been encouraging Vidur to eat with his right hand. I had to make my point very clearly saying I don't mind which hand he eats with. You can tell him not to eat with both hands, but avoid telling him which hand to use. Indians are especially paranoid about using left hand for 'important' tasks like eating. I keep telling people let him decide and then we can figure it out.

I am not looking to make my kid unique and ensure he is left handed. At the same time, I am not going to force my child to use his right hand because it is the most preferred hand for a majority. Research shows that changing this can actually affect the brain. We have to give kids the time to figure out which hand they are most comfortable using.

Stylish Blogger Award - Thank You Speech

My good friend and colleague, Nishana has awarded this blog the Stylish Blogger Award. I would like to thank her for the same. As per tradition of this award, I am to list 7 random facts about me. But, because this blog is about me, my son and my doggie, you will have to read 7 random facts about each one of us. What can I say, it's tradition. :)

7 Random Facts About Archana

1. I absolutely love reading books ranging from Mills and Boons to James Patterson to Learning by Doing. What I can't stand and never finish are self-help books. They bore me to death. 
2. I watch animated movies and the current cartoons more because I enjoy them. But, I let people believe that I am forced to watch them because of my son. :)
3. I am a sympathetic listener and most people tend to share their life stories with me. 
4. I love my work and feel sorry for those who don't. I also work from home and hate people who assume I have it easy and don't respect my work. 
5. My mom is my strength, my sister my confidant/critic.
6. I am reserved with people I don't know or don't like and extremely talkative with people I know and love. 
7. I did not know that I was a 'creative' person till I joined Kern. I did not know that I write well till I started writing for the company blog. 

7 Random Facts About Vidur

1. Use any gadget in front of him once and he will master it. Be it switching on and using a treadmill, playing a car racing game on my father-in-law's iPhone, operating my phone to play games, watch a video, take a pic, and so on. 
2. He has learnt the art of persuasion. If amma says no, ask ammama (grandmother). It always works. Grandmother's heart melts. 
3. He loves pastas and noodles. He gets extremely excited when he sees a dominoes delivery bike and runs upto to him and requests for pasta.  
4. He imitates the cartoon heroes. If you see him playing by himself, you will observe him talking to himself and saying 'Toodles' or eating ladoos or behaving like tom or jerry. At this young age, he also says I will be Buzz Lightyear, what do you want to be? 
5. I find it more entertaining watching his face as he watches something on TV. His face is a kaleidoscope of expressions. 
6. He fears nothing. He is not scared of the dark or of being left alone or of being whacked or policemen. The closest he comes to fearing anything is Deepa chithi, I think. She is the only one he listens to. :)
7. He can be a terror with all the running and jumping he does, but he loves to help out. Ask him to get water for you, or help you clean the titles and he will do so immediately. 

 7 Random Facts About Tuffy

1. Tuffy had another home before ours. The couple gave him away because they were relocating. Their loss I believe. 
2. He insists on saying hi to EVERYONE. He does not understand there are dog-people and non-dog people. In his world, everyone loves him. 
3. If you walk around with a handkerchief, you better watch out. This is his biggest weakness. He has to have that piece of cloth. 
4. He finds food on Vidur's plate more interesting than food in his own plate. This is the case even when it is the same thing! 
5. He is extremely possessive about me. Rajeev and I were talking once and Tuffy decides to butt in and sit on my lap. My uncle and dad fondly call him a cow because of his size. :) 
6. He understands Tamil better than English. He listens (unfortunately) only to me. 
7. He loves chewing on plastics toys/cups and soft toys. The satisfaction he gets from ripping a toy apart is incomparable.     

I would like to pass this award to the following blogs:

• R's World
• Next Take!

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RULES:

Thank and link back to the person who sent you the award.

Share seven things about yourself.

Spread the love and honor. Award recently discovered bloggers.

Contact these bloggers and tell them about the award.

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My Way Or the Highway!

Summer vacations are on for Vidur and therefore, bed time is flexible. He mostly lazes around the house, plays a lot of cricket, paints, plays with dough and watches his favorite cartoons. At home, my TV time is given the least priority. Vidur has top priority and then my husband. So, fights over what to watch typically take place between my husband (a 30 something) and my son (all of his 3 years). My husband has actually had to sacrifice a lot of his TV time to watch Tom and Jerry. I know what is the latest in Mr. Bean Animated/Ben 10/and so on. I love bollywood movies and used to watch Zoom (bollywood news and trailers) all the time. But, this is no longer the case. It was so bad that when emails were doing rounds of Munni vs Sheila, I was clueless as to who Sheila was. I called my mom (epitome of bollywood wisdom) to check on this.

Back to the clash between father and son, that particular evening, hubby was watching two movies simultaneously (it's an art) on cable TV. Vidur explained that he wanted to watch Tom and Jerry. Rajeev very firmly said we can't always watch what you want to watch. You can watch Tom and Jerry on the other TV. Vidur tried a few more times and that's when I decided to intervene. I put on Incredibles on the computer for him to watch. Vidur watched for a while, then got bored, and decided to play with Tuffy. I had some work so after cleaning up the Kitchen, I settled to work.

At 9:30, Vidur tells my husband, 'Off Tv, Dudu (that's what he calls himself) wants to sleep.' Rajeev was thrilled! This kid hates sleeping and fights it even when he is almost asleep. Vidur came up to me and said 'Look at time, come let's sleep amma.' He pulled me by my hand and led us to the bedroom. Rajeev tried singing him to sleep and all the while Vidur was facing me and had his eyes wide open. I wondered how he could feel sleepy after his marathon nap of three hours in the afternoon. I decided to get up and finish my work.

At 10:00, Vidur comes and settles himself on the bean bag. He looks at me and whispers 'Amma, appa sleeping, on TV, I want Tom and Jerry.' I was extremely amused as my son had managed to strategize and carry out his plan. He managed to put his father to sleep and have the TV all to himself! Kids are really smart these days.... watch out for them! 

My Brave Boy!

As most of my Facebook Buddies know (because of this pic), Vidur ran into the wall. It was the scariest thing watching my maid bring him to me with a terrible wound near his eye. As soon as I saw it, I realized that I have to take him to the doctor. I called my mom and told her to catch hold of V's doctor, took the car and rushed out. On the way, I was informed that the doctor suggested that I take him directly to a hospital. The traffic was pretty bad. Rajeev was stuck in training and therefore, there was no point contacting him.

My cousin (the hero of the day) kept calling me to check where I was going, whether I was fine, etc. I reached the hospital finally and asked the security were I had to park the car. The security guy took one look at Vidur and said leave your car here and take your son to the emergency. He then asked me how it happened as I parked it as close I could to the curb. After I explained briefly, he started saying in Hindi 'You people just don't take care of your children. Look what has happened to him.' Needless to say, I saw red. I took a precious half minute to tell him what I thought 'Is it really important for me to listen to your lecture now? Do you realize how worried and upset I am as his mother? Can you please shut up?' He got a little worried and said 'Yes ma'am. The emergency ward is this way.' I can truly understand how Geet from Jab we Met felt with that old station master.

As I entered the emergency, people jumped to attention. They immediately took over and started cleaning the wound. Till before this, Vidur insisted that he did not want to meet a doctor. But the nurses here were so good with him, he allowed them to clean as he answered important questions about his school. The doctor asked what happened. All the cleaning and the worry finally got to me. I called up my cousin and told him I needed him here. He was already on his way with my mom. What I am skipping due to acute embarrassment is the fact that I felt giddy and nurses and doc insisted that I lie down in the bed next to Vidur. Very embarrassing and funny! Vidur asked me what happened and I said nothing, it's my chance now. He was happy with that. The emergency people insisted Vidur will not need stitches but he has to meet the plastic surgeon about the scar. By this time, Vidur was enjoying all the attention he was getting. He was actually lying down with one leg over another calling for the doctor.

My cousin and mom arrived finally. They were worried about me and so they took over from there. As we waited to see the plastic surgeon, Vidur went back to being Vidur and ran all over the place. People saw his dressing and kept telling him go slowly and giving me dirty looks. As he was running, my sweet child stopped in front of me, put his hand under my chin and asked 'Amma, you ok?' I had tears in my eyes as I said 'I am fine sweetie. Are you ok?' (ok enough mush) He said 'Am fine' and continued running and driving my cousin crazy. :)

The plastic surgeon had one look at his wound and said he needs stitches. He believed that Vidur will cooperate and so we can do it with local anesthesia. Karthik was the pillar of support at the treatment room. He kept saying please wait outside. I will be with him. But I had to stay with Vidur. Vidur was a really, really brave boy. He did as he was told, didn't cry and was an angel (shows he can be when he wants to be). He just didn't like the fact that water was falling over his face and kept complaining about that. But understood when I explained that the doctor was cleaning the wound. The doctor finally said it's almost over and I parroted the same for Vidur. Vidur said 'Thank you uncle'. Sweetheart, remembers his manners at the weirdest of situations! By the time the doctor finished, he was asleep.  The doctor said 'Boys his age usually scream and shout and cry. He is a very cooperative boy.' The nurse also promptly agreed and said he is good boy. :)

The weirdest thing is after we got back from the hospital and I was sitting near him, he turned to me and asked 'Amma, you ok?' Then, again last night, in his sleep, he asks me 'Amma, you ok?' Now I am seriously worried whether something is wrong with me :D. Jokes apart, I am touched that Vidur thinks of me even at such a young age, especially when he has been hurt! Love him the most! 

Tuffy - Trying his luck

A few months back...

Is that food I smell?

Can I have some please?

Pretty please?

(trying from a different angle) Here comes 'The Look.' Let's see you say no to this.

Tuffy's Here!

The biggest news is that we brought home a doggie! How? Why? I love dogs, V loves dogs, and Rajeev does too. So, I guess it was just a matter of time before we got one. We kept putting it off initially thinking Vidur should grow up a little. But, then we heard that a friend's friends was giving a cocker spaniel. I have seen this doggie and felt sad that they were giving it away. Their reasons for giving it away was that 'it was not getting toilet trained'. Freaks! If you don't have the patience or are extremely busy, don't take on additional responsibility. Anyway, we were supposed to pick him up, but of course the lady changed her mind about giving away the dog. She apparently was enlightened by her hubby about how she may have to get another dog for the kids anyway and therefore, we might as well toilet train this one. Genius! Found out later that this family actually gave away the puppy previously for one day and got it back. Am glad I didn't have to undergo that.

But this experience did make me determined to get a puppy home and so we did. A friend helped us bring Tuffy, our golden retriever, home. Before you jump to any conclusions, we did not name him after the pom in HAKHK. One more person who asks me that is going to get it from me!! :) I guess we named him that for the following reasons:

1. This was the only name that everyone (my hubby, mom, sister, cousins, and so on) agreed on.
2. A name that Vidur was able to easily pronounce. He should be able to call his name.
3. As I picked Vidur's name, it was only fair that Rajeev picked Tuffy's. ;)

He was two months old when he came home. An adorable dog, so affectionate that he followed me around everywhere I went. He would sleep on my feet in the kitchen as I cooked, sleep under my chair as I worked and so on. Vidur was extremely possessive about him. He still asks for him first thing in the morning and when he gets back from school. They play rough and therefore, I have a new role that of a referee. 

Having a dog has its share of responsibilities and pain points, but it is nothing compared to the love and happiness Tuffy brings with it!

 

What happens in school?

Vidur has settled well into school and this really makes me happy! :) I received a 'communication folder' from the school one day and was pleasantly surprised to get a sneak peak into what my son does in school. Vidur doesn't talk much and therefore, when I ask him 'What did you do in school today?' he replies 'Joola' (swing or the slides). I used to wonder whether that was all he did there. Though I am not particular about they teach and am more keen on Vidur enjoying himself there, I am extremely curious to know how they handle a bunch of hyper 2-5 year olds. Coming back to the communication folder, this folder showed block paintings, sand sprinkling, painting dots on a frog and bird, sticking craft paper and so on. I was so proud seeing what Vidur had done in school. Though I must admit that it was too neat (except for the page titled Scribling) for me to believe that my son had truly done this. ;)

The school like most other play schools stays in touch with the parents through circulars. I got a circular informing us that Parent and Teaching Interaction forum was scheduled on Saturday and the slot given to Vidur was 10:15-10:30. AS we entered the school, a lady told us to wait five minutes. She mentioned that we could look at the charts hung up in the meantime. As we looked at the charts, we were thrilled to see snaps of Vidur in class. He was sitting in a perfect circle wearing a bright red apron. Apron to protect his clothes from the paint. Hats off to the teachers. I would never have been able to keep Vidur so clean if I had him paint at home. :) Coming back to Vidur sitting in a circle, I was pleasantly surprised to see that he did in fact sit in one place to do an activity.

From my previous post, you will remember that I hate schools that complain about children and I had such a good impression about this school. I know Vidur is a very naughty boy. Like all boys his age, he shoves, fights, and I think you get the picture. I was worried that I was going to either get a series of complaints or sugar coated complaints and feedback. I was already on the defensive even before I reached there. But, Vidur's teachers surprised me again. They focused on the positives. They told me:

1. How 'social' my son was. He insists on saying hi to everyone he sees whether it is the person who cleans up or the teachers teaching other classes or the children from other classes. He asks for other students/his friends when don't turn up in school. He has his own versions of their name and check where they are. 
2. How he loved to share his food with others. They told me that he loved biscuits and cake (thankfully I know that, he is my son you know and I am an informed mother :)) and insisted on sharing with others. He also insists that others share with him onthe days they get cake. I think that's fair. :) 
3. How the teachers have learnt to communicate with him. Vidur understands Tamil well, but speaks two words at a time. You need to know him to understand what he is saying. But his teachers have learnt to communicate with him. They get what he is saying. 
4. How Vidur is the one who changes the date on the board. Teacher was proud to say that Vidur insists on changing the date everyday and he gets it right most of the time. 
5. How he listens when the teacher says 'no'. Vidur listens when we tell him no and also ensures that other kids don't do it. Rajeev was shocked, he insisted later that we should take this teacher home if Vidur does listen to her. :) She also mentioned that Vidur goes and stands by the window if she raised her voice and talks to him. Then, she has to console and coax him back. 
6. He is the first person to dance during the dance activity and ensured that everyone in that vicinity dances. He has got this trait from his mother's side for sure. His mom, aunt and grandpa love to dance. :) He is extremely kicked about doing the activities. 

Overall, I was extremely glad that I got to meet Vidur's teachers and find an environment that Vidur is very comfortable in. It is obvious that Vidur is very popular there and he loves all the attention he gets.

My next point about schools is: How much of trouble they take to may it fun for students and for parents. In this last month, I have had two opportunities to dress Vidur up in ethnic wear, send him to school as per color codes, send him fruit to school, and so on. The parents are happy that something different is being done, kids are generally happy! But, this is just right. I hope they don't over do and force me to go get outfits that Vidur will never wear and make it a painful ordeal for us. :)

Vidur in Bangalore and the experiences so far

We had to relocate from one state to another. I keep wondering what must be going through my little one's head. Over night, his home, his environment, the people have changed. Does he associate Bangalore with his new school? Does he wonder where the people who were always with him in Chennai are? Does his new home feel like home to him. I know most people say kids are very adaptable and there is no doubt regarding this. But am sure a lot goes through their heads too.


I was a little apprehensive while looking for play schools for Vidur. I looked at three schools near my new home. Two of them were Montessori style. I did not like one and the other one... Well, I liked the teachers, I really did. And I was (and still am) awed by the Montessori style of teaching. But..... Let me explain what I saw in this particular school. The lady who runs the schools was very impressive. She spoke well and was very good at tackling my queries. She had two requests before she showed me inside.

1. Please do not talk when inside. I will explain and answer all your queries when we come outside. The children are busy with their activities and we don't want to disturb them. 
2. Please do not step on the activity mats. Be careful to walk around them.  

I did not know what the activity mats were, but since she insisted, I walked on my toes. As I entered, I was impressed by the space. I saw children of ages 2-5 sitting and doing their activity on their respective mats (AHA!). She showed me different rooms and the tools used. A girl (aged 4 probably) walked up to her and asked her, "Can I paint now?" She responded "Sure. First roll up your mat and get your apron." The girl obediently rolled up her mat and placed it where ever it had to go. Then, she put on an apron and waited patiently as the teacher tied it for her. The girl collected the paint items and neatly sat down to paint. I was, needless to say, speechless. Why? Well, if you have been following my blog, you may understand how 'ACTIVE' my son is. He is very, very naughty. I had great difficulty imagining my son in these settings. So, after the tour was over, I told her the same. To this she said, most parents are not firm with their children. In this school, we are very strict about our rules. This is the main reason we take in only one or two new children on Mondays and Wednesdays. It takes time but the child eventually settles down. While I was sure that she must be right, I decided against this school for the following reasons:

• I was a little worried that this school was too quiet. Imagine throwing fifteen 2-5 years old together and hearing pin drop silence. Eerieeeeeeeeeeeee. I thought children should make some noise and have some fun. 
• There was absolutely no play area. Two small slides on concrete near the gate were all the play the kids would get. Hated this thought. While I was inside, I thought it was safer if Vidur stayed outside with my mother. I couldn't be firm enough and explain to my son that he had to be quiet and not step on the mats. So, he was playing on the only two slides and he kept landing PLONK on the concrete!
• The fees was too high. I am not paying that much to change my son's personality to an obedient boy! 

I went to another school. As soon as I entered, I fell in love with it. I saw it and thought I wish I could come here everyday. It had a lovely playground, a splash pool, the whole building was painted in bright colors and most importantly the head mistress was not pushy. She gave me a lot of time and space to make up my mind. Vidur obviously joined this school.

On the first day of school, Vidur very excitedly ran inside expecting me to follow him. Because of the relocation, he joined one month late. Therefore, I could not help him selttle into school by being there with him. But for all ts worth, my mom and I waited three hours outside for the whole week and kept straining our ears to hear him. I think this transition into school is a very traumatic experience for children, parents and grand parents (am sure the list can grow longer). I keep thinking isn't there a nicer way to do this rather than say they will cry the first few days and then settle down. My dad says I am too fussy. Well, maybe I am. :)

But finally there came a day (and mind you very soon at that) when he walked in and said bye to me with excitement in his eyes. He loves his teacher and she is really sweet to him too. Finally, I was at peace! Vidur had taken a liking to school! One day I reached early and was waiting outside with Vidur. One of the assistants walked to me and said very sweetly 'Vidur does not sit in class. He insists on standing all the time. Please try telling him that he needs to sit in class. He is very smart and speaks a lot. I don't usually approve of schools complaining about the students. But this was different. I have heard instances when teachers ask parents to stop the child from hitting other or eating from others lunch boxes! Well, I believe that the school  has taken up the responsibility of teaching social skills and so on. Therefore, you can please teach kids whats 'right' and what is not. I am sure the parents do their bit. Its almost like the next thing they will say is you son is not studying or concentrating in class. Being an instructional designer, it is my habit to not blame the learner and to take complete responsibility if learning does not happen. So, now you know where I am coming from... :)

That's it about schools. One day, I decided to take Vidur to a nearby park. This park is very new and therefore, very appealing to kids and parents. The park was closed and later I found out that this park was open only from 5-7. Two people collect membership fees of Rs. 100 from each parent. This money is used for planting trees, maintaining swings/slides, and paying a full time watchman. The watchman ensured that teenagers do not misuse the park and that kids from the near by slum do not enter. I have absolutely no issues with people collecting money to maintain a public park and will happy contribute to the same. But, deep down I did have a problem with the park being closed to kids form the slum. Are they not allowed to have fun? Is this not a PUBLIC park? Are we all elitist in our outlook? Are we worried that our children will learn the wring things if in their company? I did not say anything to her as I was new and don't want to offend anybody. But, I do not believe in creating further divisions in our society, there are enough without us trying to do so...

Vidur's Favorite Cartoons

Vidur's Favorite

1. Little Krishna: Has your kid been introduced to Little Krishna? If no, I highly recommend that you purchase these DVDs immediately. My son loves Krishna. Not only him, I love this animated series. The characterisations, the details, the graphics, the background score, the narration seem just perfect. The darling of vrindavan just captures your heart and has you hooked.

Vidur is a huge fan. He plays the flute like Krishna, jumps like him, dances like him. The visualisation is amazing. I think just the fact that these stories are presented in highly graphical and less preachy fashion itself makes it a brilliant piece.

2. Monsters Inc.: Vidur loves 'boo', the kid, in this movie. The monsters don't scare him, but make him laugh. I love the concept of the monster world connected to the human world by a closet door. Very interesting how they make abominable snowman and big foot banished monsters!

3. Tom and Jerry: Good old, Tom and Jerry! Who doesn't love it? Cartoons such as this one will live on forever. What I love about this cartoon is that is truly a cartoon for all ages. It makes my son laugh, me laugh, and my father laugh and I don't think this is going to change.


4. Bolt: The latest to the list is Bolt. This super dog will no real super power has captured my son's heart. He loves the first seen where Bolt (as a pup) plays with the carrot toy. This scene brings a smile on his face always. Very cute movie that has three very special characters: Bolt, Mittens, and Rhino.



These are my favorites too and I don't mind watching these over and over with him.

Marley & Me - My Thoughts

I watched the movie, Marley & Me yesterday. It touched my heart on so many levels. All dog lovers must watch this movie. My thoughts:

1. A entry of a child in a relationship changes EVERYTHING. Life is not the same and definitely as easy as it used to be. I was watching the movie, while Rajeev my hubby worked away on his laptop in another room. During the scene where Jen snaps at John, Rajeev says 'Oh, this seems to be the story of our life.' Relationships are tough. Add a kid to it and it reaches very close to breaking point. :)
2. Marley reminds me of my dog, Micky. I don't remember a day that she obeyed us. She would drag us when we went for a walk. Like John in the movie, we would constantly be heard saying 'Micky, no!' Not much has changed, these days, you will hear me saying, 'Vidur, no!' That's another thing, Marley' naughtiness/playfulness reminds me of my son.
3. Bringing up a dog is in no way preparing you to bring up a child. Nothing prepares you, you just learn on the way.
4. Marley does everything he is not supposed to do and so does Vidur! :) He leaves no opportunity, no stone unturned.
5. The scene where Marley places his head on Jen's lap when she breaks down after her losing her child reminded me of the time when Micky refused to leave my side when I was extremely upset.
6. The scene where Jen asks Jon to send Marley away but later tell hims that she didn't mean it, makes her so real. Sometimes we feel irrational, snap at people around us, and blame everyone else. It is ok to do this as along as we know later that we were just upset.
7. I cried my eyes out when there was no hope for Marley. I experienced what my parents must have gone through when they had to make the toughest decision of their life, relieve Micky of her misery. I cried even after the movie was over thinking how right John was, dogs love unconditionally. It doesn't matter who you are or where you come from...

Peepa and Vidur

Ever since we got back from Mumbai, Vidur insists that I show him the videos we shot there. The first video is one where Deepa (my sister) is cutting her birthday cake. These videos help Vidur remember his aunt and uncle. Infact, he is so found of Deepa that when people ask him what his name is, he responds 'Peepa!' At one time, it was Harish (his favorite uncle... :)

So, Peepa was here for the weekend and Vidur was so happy! He woke up to find Peepa sleeping next to him. He looked at me and said 'Amma! Peepa!' Then, paused and asked 'Chitta?' Chitta a.k.a chittappa a.k.a Sriram (Deepa's hubby). I told him chitta was sleeping in the other room. He was absolutely thrilled! When they got ready to leave, the poor thing was so heartbroken. When Peepa and I went shopping, I got out of the auto and asked V to join me. He said 'No,no. Peepa ba'. He got off the auto and help on to Peepa's hand. A car reversed from the parking lot and was heading past Peepa. V, knight in shining armor, pulled Peepa closer towards him and said 'Peepa!! CAR!!!' Then, he looked left and right, ensured that the lane was safe enough for Peepa to cross. My sister was amazed that V had tried to save her life. Sheesh! My family is good at theatrics! :D (And according to people at work, I am the biggest natak rani. They tell me V takes after me and I am secretly proud!)

It is such a beautiful relationship that of a nephew and aunt/uncle. Children get so attached to people who genuinely care. I know we get to meet each other often. But, how I wish we were all in one place and the kids grew up with each other like a true family! Maybe, one day.....

Going Crazy with a Video Camera

For our 5th wedding anniversary, my parents gifted us a Video Camera. Nice, but totally selfish gesture on their part. Why? Well, they got us a video camera so that we can capture their grandson and share it often with them. :)

It took me time to remember that I had a video cam and start using it often. Once we started though, we are both like tourists with a camera. Taking videos of everything, taking the video cam everywhere! Also, with busy parents who will not invest money in video editing software, we have been uploading short, weirdly taken videos on YouTube. (God bless YouTube for not putting quality checks in place).

My mom very studiously watches, oohs and aahs over everything Vidur does. I guess it is great fun to capture precious moments and share with people who truly care. My memory is really terrible. Most times, I am asking my sister if I have seen a particular movie. She claims that it is great fun sharing gossip with me. Even if she repeats it to me, I respond to it as if I were hearing it for the first time. So, it is good that I have a camera. Now, I don't need to remember, I can just record it!

School Hunting: A Terrifying Experience

Recently, I wrote a blog post on Understanding Your Learners: All things that you can do wrong. This post basically captured the experience of a parent during the admission process. My son is two now and I have started looking for good playschool. I have been thinking about sending him to school for some time now. Why?

1. He just loves going out. He hates being locked up in the house. He can spend hours outside without complaining.

2. He does not get an opportunity to play with kids his own age.

But what do I want from a school?

1. V must go to a place where he can have FUN. If enjoys himself, he will learn anyway.
2. It must have teachers who are warm, friendly, and likable.
3. It must have a playground.
4. The classroom must be neat, airy, and flooded with natural light.
5. Finally, this school should not be like regular school! (Read on you will understand what I mean)

I want the first exposure to learning to be a positive one. He should want to learn and not be forced to learn. Let me share some school hunting experience.

School 1: A charming school with a small playground, extremely friendly staff, and a lovely teaching concept. The only negative was that the classrooms did not have natural light. The staff were taking a break. They were really nice to Vidur. They spoke to him and shared a pastry with him. Vidur ran around pulling things that he was not supposed to. I turned and asked one of the staff "How do you handle hyper kids?' She smiled and said why would you want to label children. Needless to say, I was impressed.

School 2: As soon as I reached the gates of this school, I saw mothers standing outside waiting to pick their children up. I stepped forward and informed the teacher that I had an appointment with the principal. She asked whether it was regarding admissions. When I confirmed, she said please wait for the transition to get over. I had no idea what "transition" meant in this context. I moved away to wait. I saw a mother trying to feed her child. I approached her and asked her about the school.
Mother: My son took a long time to adjust to school and therefore, has hardly attended any classes. He keeps falling sick.
Me: Oh, I see. My son is two and I am looking around for good schools.
Mother: This school is supposed to be the best in town. But, why do you want to put your child in a school so early? The month of January has pongal holidays and then when they reopen they will have tests.
Me: They have tests for these children? (I wanted to run far away when I heard the word 'test')
Mother: It is more like oral examinations where they will ask what they have taught to the children. You should put your kid in school at the age of three. (By this time, I am wondering why she put her son in school this early. I am also reminded of a dialogue from the movie jab we met where Kareena asks the station master whether he takes money for his advice)
Me: I think he is ready now. He just loves going out and being with people.
Mother: Maybe you should try a creche/day school. They take kids of ages up to three. My kid keeps falling sick all the time.
Me: Oh that's sad. My son occasionally wheezes but otherwise he is fine.
Mother: Oh, you know what. Amway has a special product for wheezing. You take this tablet for 14 days and you will never get wheezing again. I can have somebody come home and demonstrate. When will you be free?

By this time, I realize that I have unconsciously walked into a sales trap. I don't know how to tell her I am not interested. So, I told her: 'Can it be used for children aged 2? I must check with the doctor and my husband.'

Thankfully, the teacher calls me and says the principal is now ready to meet me. The teacher herself was extremely grumpy looking. I don't think she could have smiled if her life depended on it. The principal spoke nicely enough, trying to convince me that this school was really good. She explained that my son will be put in a play group first and then moved to nursery later. She explained that playgroup comprised of 1.8-2.5 year old. The session will draw to a close in the month of June. I threw a trick question at her:
Me: Will my son miss something as classes have already been in progress?
Principal: No, we have revisions in the month of February, so he will make up for it.

Revision? Tests? What kind of place is this? My kid is 2. I just want him to have fun. I don't want a real school for him. I thanked her and ran away as fast as I could.

School 3: My husband visited another school. He met the in charge and explained that he had come to see the school. The lady started introducing the school by telling my husband: 'Children must be bought to school by 9. We will not allow late comers inside the school. If he is late, you have to take your son back and get him the next day. Please do not argue later.'

My husband was shocked. He said: 'I have come to see the school and you have already started giving me a list of rules?' The lady actually managed to look sheepish. The school itself was beautiful. Another rule that she mentioned was that the kid must be toilet trained to get admission. This had me wondering, even if my son was toilet trained, would he ask someone else to take him to the loo?

School 4: This was a cosy place with a huge playground, colorful tables, neat classrooms. It was a little further away from home. But, I was ready to invest in travel to ensure that my son got a good deal. My husband had already checked out this school and the rates. I was made to wait outside for 15 minutes while the cleaning took place. Several parents came to pick up their kids. I asked one of the parents whether this school was nice. She said 'yes it is good. I work and therefore, it is very useful.' I guess people have different notions of what makes a school good. Finally, I was allowed inside. The place was nice. As I spoke to them about the rates, I realized that they expected us to pay for the entire term even though only only two months were left! I asked her why would anyone pay as much? Obviously, she had no answer. It was take it or leave it. I decided to leave it. As I left this place, the lady asked me, 'How do you manage your son at home? He is so active!' This is when I thought to myself 'Now, you know why I am looking to put him in a school and if you don't know the answer to that, I don't want to put my son here.' I now suspect that she asked me for the whole terms fees hoping I would refuse to pay. My son scared them off. Yes, this is it!

I finally decided on School 1. I was called for an interview. The first black mark against me was that my husband was unable to attend as he was conducting training. I entered the room with Vidur in my arms. I did this to ensure that he stayed in one place. One of the ladies in the room asked me to put Vidur down. I did, and he promptly got off the chair and ran for the door. The lady said its ok and asked me which language he was comfortable with. I said Tamil and in Tamil she asked him whether he wanted to go out and let him out. So, it was going to be just me and them. The lady asked me why Rajeev didn't make it. I explained. They asked me to describe about myself and Rajeev. I explained. They were interested in my job as an ID and asked me to explain. Anyone who knows me knows never to talk about my job. Why? Because once I start talking about it, I take a long time to stop. But I managed to keep it short and explained what I did. She then asked me what I expected from education. I gave my funda borrowing from the philosophies we use at work to encourage adults to learn. My main point was 'make it fun and they will learn anyway'. They heard me out. Then they asked me whether Vidur's milestones were normal. When did he walk, talk, etc. I think parents should remember these details only if they are worried about it. Anyway, I gave them some numbers. They told me that he seemed very active and how did I manage him at home. I explained that he plays with his toys, loves going to the park, and watching TV. That caught their attention... The next obvious question was how much TV does he watch in a day. I thought to myself uh-ho. I explained that he watched Tom and Jerry when it is on. They let me off the hook! They concluded the meeting by saying they will get back in touch.

Vidur got admission in school 1 and I am happy about it. Now, all I need to do is ensure that the months fly by and my son does not destroy too many things! June come soon! ;)

Vidur's flight to Hyderabad

Vidur is now a big boy and all of his (almost) 2 years. He refuses to be carried when he wants to run around. He refuses to walk when he wants to be carried and most often than not, he gets his way. December end is vacation time all over the world and I am one of the few lucky people whose company shuts down for Christmas and New Years. This winter, Vidur and I planned to visit his paternal grandparents in Secunderabad.

I opted to travel by flight. I could bear to think of a night train journey alone with Vidur. I was quite sure he would drive me crazy. Rajeev left us at the airport. As soon as I scanned my luggage at the Air India counter, I saw two really huge lines. Basically, two counters were open and passengers for all flights were standing awaiting their turn. Vidur was sitting on top on my luggage on the trolley. He was enjoying the ride and therefore, hated it when I stopped to stand in the queue. The queue barely moved. Everyone was discussing with each other as to what the problem could be. Vidur in the meantime was getting restless and was miming away asking me to take him to the left or right. I tried to keep him occupied by giving him a piece of paper to tear.

My flight to Hyderabad was at 4:15. The gentleman standing in front of me asked me where I was going. He was also going to Hyderabad and was alarmed that it was 3:45. He said he would check with somebody. In the meantime, Vidur got off the trolley and started walking towards the exit. I stayed where I was, thinking he would turn back and check if he was being followed. But the brave boy just kept walking very purposefully. I had to run and carry him back to where my luggage was. Traveling light is an alien concept after you have a kid in the family. Finally, the kind gentleman told me that a separate queue had been formed for Hyderbad. Lucky for him, he was the first in that queue. I was the fourth. Another really long wait. I was seriously beginning to wonder is the Air India groundsman had fallen asleep over the passenger's tickets. Vidur was not totally bored. He ran off towards the security check. I went and got him back. He did not want to stand in the queue and therefore, saw it necessary to lie flat on the floor. The bachelors standing behind me the queue were witness to all this. They were extremely tickled. I realized how funny and cute the situation would have seemed to an outsider. But I was definetely and trule HASSLED. I cursed myself for traveling with check in baggage. Finally, I passed on a bottle of milk to Vidur. He was occupied for sometime. It was almost my turn and I was going to cry with relief. It was 4 now. A lady in brown salwar and long straight hair trotted to the begining of the queue and pushed her ticket forward. It was my turn and I was so furious. I asked her, 'Madam, do you see this long queue. We have been waiting for so long. How can you cut it?' She says "Sorry, but my flight is at 4:25." To this I replied, 'Oh really? My flight is at 4:15. I am a hassled mother do not mess with me!' By now both she and the AI staff were looking alarmed. He pushed her ticket back to her and asked for mine. I put my luggage on the weighing scale. AI uncle said 'Oh this does not seem to be working!' He then spent a good minutes trying to figure out whether my name was Archana Narayan or Nayanan A (as they write in tickets). He asked me and I gave him a look that meant that this is Airline terminology and I do not understand. After consultation with a fellow uncle, he finally gave me my boarding pass. You would think they would be efficient with small things such as check in! It was painful! I headed for the security check. An old lady was trying to adjust her baggage into the screening belt. I was waiting my turn, when the same lady in brown salwar cut the queue for the second time and tried to shove her luggage in. I yelled again 'There you go again! What is your problem?' She managed to look sorry but I wonder what gives some women the right to cut queues and demand special treatment!

Finally, I was in the plan. The plane did not take off till 5:00. The captain announced that the delay was caused by lost passengers. I was so tempted to get up and say it is because of your terribly slow grounds staff. But my hands were full. Vidur was very happy to see the small TV screen. He was bored soon thought. I had to do several things to ensure that he sat in one place for a whole hour. I wish the planes would have a kids area where they can play. Imagine they would be happy and will not bother others. Changing diapers is another challenge in the plane. Anyway, I was glad it was finally over...

G.O.A

In the month of November, we headed for GOA. Vidur was very excited to see clouds outside the plane's window. As we went through a cloud, the turbulence scared a few. But, Vidur was thrilled. He eagerly pointed out of the window. Juice, crayons, and a coloring book kept him in one place.

The one hour long journey from the Airport to the resort was testing for adults as well as the children. Thought the children cribbed less. :) Finally, we reached the resort. The resort itself was lovely. Spacious rooms with lovely curtains and bedspreads. I fell in love with the place immediately. The weather was just right. Neither to hot, not cold.

We were a huge gang of 9 adults and 2 children. Goa was (needless to say) fabulous. We stayed at Resort Teraa Paraiso (lovely place!). As soon as we reached the resort, we had some yummy starters and the kids moved to the baby pool. Both, Rishabh and Vidur, are fascinated by water and there was no way we could keep them away from it. However, within five minutes both the kids drank some water. This changed their views. Both refused to go in. They stood on the edge and played with the colorful balls that Karthik was passing.

The next day when we got into the pool, the kids were still not sure. We had to coax Vidur in by distracting his attention. And it worked! Soon, he was enjoying himself and was passed from one adult to the other. The water was just lovely. Any trip is fab or not based on the company and how the kids behave. Both the children were absolute angels! They loved the bike rides around Goa. I think it helped that most of us had already seen Goa. Therefore, unlike most sight seers, we were glad to just see selected places and ensured that we did not cram everything in a day. We had to keep in mind kid's routines. Therefore, the stay in Goa was relaxing and the kids were also in great mood as their routine was not disturbed too much.

Vidur was also fascinated by the beach! He was thrilled that he was allowed to play in the sand and water. Goa cruise was another thing that we enjoyed. Vidur started dancing to the beat even before the program begun. When the program began, kids were asked to come to the stage and danced. Vidur was waiting for this! We had to drag him off the stage. :)

The trip was perfect! No cranky babies, no tantrums, lovely company, several favorite uncles for the kids, lovely resort, yummy food, and FAB Goa!

Letter to Tata Sky

Dear Tata Sky,

When I first subscribed to your service, I wondered who would ever watch the 100 channel. Why? The same advertisement, say Metlife insurance, plays over an over again for an hour or so. But, today, I realize its true value. I must apologize for not seeing its importance earlier.

I would like to take a moment to thank you for airing this channel. This channel keeps me sane. It ensures that my patience levels are not tested. My two year old son needs to watch advertisements to eat his food. His attention is totally and completely captured by ads and therefore, he does not realize that he is being fed. Earlier, I used to surf through channels searching for ads. Now, am glad that I have rediscovered Channel 100 and the fact that Vidur does not get bored of the same ad. He can watch the same ad for ages and not get bored. I prefer the coca cola ads. Why? Coca cola ads show Thumbs up, Maaza, Coca Cola, Limca and so on and therefore, it provides some variation for me.

Thanks once again!
Relieved Mommy

Party Time!

I know... it has been ages since I blogged. I came online thinking I will work. Then, I realized I just had to blog about today's experience.

We were invited to Rajeev's boss' kid's party. Vidur had a fabulous time. There were kids (obviously), lots of balloons, b'day caps, goodies, cake, chocolate fountain, scrumptious starters, yummy food, and ice cream. As soon as we entered, we were greeted by Mickey Mouse. Before I go ahead, I must explain something. Vidur watches Mickey Mouse Club House on Disney channel everyday. This is more of a ritual. He needs to watch the cartoon to drink his milk. Therefore, Vidur was excited to see a life size Mickey (though I think if Mickey was real, he would not be as tall as an average human). Vidur ran around whilst keeping an eye on what the older boys were up to. As the other children and adults played games, he danced. He also managed to trouble a few other children by snatching their balloon or pulling their shirts.

Five minutes after we got there, Vidur made his presence felt by pulling out the balloons decorated around the table on which the cake was kept. The host was kind enough to say this is what kids must do! After the games, Vidur got a really cute car tattoo on his hand. I had waited till almost the end to get it done. This is because I was so sure that he will not sit in one place or he will ruin the tattoo or his/my clothes. But guess what? He did neither. He sat still as the tattooist drew a red car on his hand. As soon as the tattoo was done, Vidur sat still for another five minutes as I blew into the color to help it dry faster.

There was a clown who made those balloons that twist into a fancy shapes. The clown made a crown like thing for Vidur. Vidur, however, refused to let the clown place it on his head. I suspect he was scared of the clown's colorful hair and red nose. Quite frankly, I find clowns scary rather than funny (I did ensure that Vidur was not aware of my bias. I would prefer if he forms his own opinions :)). They are too colorful and have wide scary mouths on a painted face.

Next was Mickey's turn. Vidur ran to Mickey. He turned, looked at me and said 'mickey'. I was quite surprised as I had not expected Vidur to make the connection. Mickey was very friendly. He ignored the few naughty kids who threw paper pieces at him. I guess he is used to this. Vidur watched other kids shake hands with Mickey. He would put his hand out, but quickly snatch it back when Mickey made a move to hold his hand. I am not sure if he was scared. But, he refused to go nearer or touch Mickey. He was fascinated though and continued to jump out of Mickey's way with a giggle. I guess life size versions of cartoon's are also scary? Not sure... Anyways, the bottom line is Vidur had a great time! Birthday parties are fun.